Back from sin flight

I thought I know love, but love always taught me better…dunno why am harping around those thoughts…just feeling so washed out suddenly.

Just back from sin trip, brain-dead, body-dead, yet can’t seem to sleep, am instead hoping to sort out messy thoughts through writing.
Perhaps just melancholic after a trip home, where warmth and love are in abundance. The air-con in my apartment…too robust as usual, and the cold creeps into you insidiously, still managing a strike every time no matter how prepared, fleece, blankets and all.
Have many things that I like to do, read, watch, and friends to meet, yet can’t muster any strength, except do my laundry, and pack away all the stuff and food I have brought back from sin, and sort of scatter those little bits of warmth around me for as long as they does. It’s not that I do not appreciate my own little turf here in dubai, or the silence and peace after a night’s work. Just passing through a moment of clarity tending toward the darkness coz the mind is too disillusioned from fatigue. Perhaps more like passing through a moment of blur that seemed clear.
Figured that only means I really need to catch up on my sleep, and see how I feel after that. Nothing to worry about I tell myself, just worry about going to sleep and get some much needed rest before thinking of anything else. If those low feelings still linger after I wake, then perhaps I should start worrying a little more. And sleep I did after putting mind at ease. Must have nodded off instantly. Woke up in time for a little daylight left which does help to lessen any further disorientation after these 9-day trips, age must be catching up slowly but surely. Realized I am taking longer to recuperate from the long trips, but I did stretched myself out flat in the last 24 hours as time is too precious and never enough in sin. Cooked myself something to eat and decided to put pulp fiction on while chomping down pandan cake from bengawan solo. Haven’t watched that classic for a while, and it is still as great as I remembered. Those low feelings have mostly dispersed by then, which is a relief. But the sleepy bug is still leeching on until it has had its fill of zzzzs, so I am going to try to satiate that now.